Warning! This recap is going to be raw. I may have met some of my softball goals, but I fell way short of my true targets.
| Missed a pro series point by 15s |
This was one of the worst race weeks I’ve had in terms of stress. Even though it was self-inflicted, I could not shake it. Since December, I have averaged 20 hours/week and never dipped below 17. I was feeling a bit worn out, but very fit. The pressure to perform came from the sacrifices made these last 5 months, and I really wanted that training and effort to bear fruit. I’ll get into the details in each section on the recap.
Race Week: As I mentioned, this was a stressful week for me. The night before our flight, my dad called me at midnight to tell me our first flight was cancelled. We made a snap decision to drive to O’Hare after a call with United to make our connection. This meant getting up at 3:45AM after some already broken sleep. Thankfully my buddy Drobs handled the driving/parking to take as much stress off me as possible. Everything was smooth sailing after that.
Once we arrived we got checked in early, built my bike and got me out for a ride and run. My Achilles was bothering me during the run, so we decided to shut down running until race day. We also managed to squeeze in check-in before heading to dinner.
One little stressor was riding around the Woodlands leading up to the race. I found a 2 mile loop I could repeat and many times as needed, but getting to and from was a little sketchy.
| Bike Check with Taylor Knibb |
Swim (1:00:20): The 80 pro men mass start wasn’t too bad because I was spit out the back quickly. I went as hard as I could for the first 500 yards to attempt to make a pack but was at my limit and ended up settling in with 3-4 other very weak swimmers. Turns out we were jockeying for last place back there. I wasn’t expecting a great time, but I thought I would be better than an hour… the top 3 female pros passed me halfway into the channel, and this was the first indicator that I’m probably not cut out to be a professional. There were only 4 bags left when I got to mine, so I knew I was pretty much last out of the water.
Bike (4:37:57): The bike started out alright but I was quickly passed by Kat and Solveig around mile 10. I rode off the back of them for a few miles, but lost touch before we got to Hardy Toll Road. I was ok with being dopped for a World Champion... I held my power targets but felt HR was a little high early on. The entire south section was into a headwind and I was solo the entire time. I felt like I was riding conservative at the lower end of my range at 240W and was more or less waiting to bump it up on loop 2. Once I got there, I didn’t feel like I could. My glutes felt useless and even that lower range was not sustainable for me. I was also having a hard time with passing the age groupers and another pair of female pros caught me. Second sign that I’m not cut out for professional racing. I did my best to let them through and not interfere, but anytime they got cut off, I’d be in the 20M draft and needed to execute a pass. I knew this was annoying to them, but we had a ref riding along side us the entire time and I really couldn’t afford a penalty with how slow I was riding.
There was an interesting wind shift that also made my split a bit faster. Despite my power numbers dropping and only pushing 220W, I was still holding 24mph. I will also admit that I was getting a draft off the ref’s moto while I hung back from the 2 women. This lasted about 10 miles before I caught a 2nd wind and decided to make a decisive pass and leave them behind with 20 miles to go. As I was finishing the last mile, Jackie Hering came around me and that felt like the nail on the coffin. I let her through and nearly ate it at the dismount line when she came to a complete stop to get off her bike.
Run (3:02:04): I was proud of myself for getting to the run and was hoping this is where my race would turn around. I did my best to just run comfortable, and that ended up being around 6:40 pace for most of the first loop. I was able to pee around mile 4 and felt ok overall. Anytime I was running faster, I pulled back to try and save myself for that final loop. Jackie again caught me around mile 10 and I ran with her and Grace Thek for a few miles. I even apologized for the bike jockeying earlier.
Mile 11 my core cramped and slowed me down to a crawl; I was ready to throw in the towel and call it a day. But, I thought about everyone back home tracking and my support crew that came all this way just for me… It’ll pass became my mantra and after a painful mile it finally did. The rest of laps 2 and 3 were getting congested with lapped athletes and many would stop right in front of me, grabbing every cups in sight. It was certainly a mistake to keep my momentum and not wait for them to move to get what I needed. It was extremely humid and a noticed that any ice I put in my kit melted within a minute. My core temp was clearly high, but my CORE sensor wasn’t giving me a reading to verify. I entered fight mode the entire 2nd half, focusing on a course PR to motivate myself. If there’s any positive I can take away from the race, it’s the tenacity and grit on a non-ideal day. 20 pros DNFed for various reasons if that says anything. And looking back at some data, my HR never dipped and steadily rose the entire marathon. Despite that, my pace fell off and I was definitely dehydrated. 8:44:59 official finish time.
Final Thoughts: In all honesty, if I hadn’t booked travel and accommodations for my next 3 races…I’d be done right now. Despite “earning” my pro card, I am so far away from being able to validate and actually keep it. In my mind, that pretty much says I’m not deserving of it. I’ve also heard a few podcasts talk about this exact same topic and that someone like me should not be a professional. Final stat: 7 amateurs and 7 female pros beat me, and that’s just sad. That all being said, I’ll be back to it pretty quick with Gulf Coast in less than 3 weeks. Hopefully the body can recover quickly and perform better at the shorter distance.
PS: I’m not looking for validation or sympathy about the race, but if you do have comments...feel free to send them my way, positive or negative. I'm just being vulnerable and honest about it all.






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